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Two years ago...
Sep. 11th, 2003 08:48 amI was sitting in my living room, having just turned on the TV because WNYC reporters had said - just before the radio cut out entirely - that there were reports of a fire at the World Trade Center. I was looking at the smoke and fire billowing upward from the plane-shaped hole in the side of one of the towers, foolishly thinking that - although it was certainly horrible, and everyone above that point was almost certainly dead - at least they might be able to get up there somehow and put out the fire and save the building.
At 9:02, still watching in disbelief, I saw the second plane hit. I saw it before the reporters did; they were talking away and chattering and suddenly exclaimed about the explosion in the other tower. They had only seen the result. I had seen the sleek, deadly shape swooping in from the right of the picture, taking its aim, preparing to strike. That was when we knew it was all on purpose, that somebody had done this deliberately. But still, I thought, if they could just put out the fires...
At 9:40 or so, as the second tower hit was the first to collapse (I apologize, but I get so confused between "tower one and tower two," "north tower and south tower") - I never even thought it possible that they would collapse. It never even crossed my mind. I was devastated. Unable to really think about the loss of life, all I could seem to think of was that I had loved that skyline, I had loved the sight of those two shining steel-and-glass pillars anchoring the island, and it was gone...but maybe they could at least save one of them.
And then at 10:30, as the first tower hit collapsed in slow and stately horrible elegance, I just screamed. Just sat in my living room and screamed.
I'm still not really used to the new skyline. I still feel a twinge, flying into Newark and seeing the Empire State Building and not seeing the towers, even though I know they're long since gone. I feel anger at the people who did this thing, who thought it was a just thing to do. I feel anger at the people who lead this country, who have used this thing that was done to us as an excuse for all manner of unconscionable things. I feel overwhelmingly sad at the turns the world has taken since then.
At 9:02, still watching in disbelief, I saw the second plane hit. I saw it before the reporters did; they were talking away and chattering and suddenly exclaimed about the explosion in the other tower. They had only seen the result. I had seen the sleek, deadly shape swooping in from the right of the picture, taking its aim, preparing to strike. That was when we knew it was all on purpose, that somebody had done this deliberately. But still, I thought, if they could just put out the fires...
At 9:40 or so, as the second tower hit was the first to collapse (I apologize, but I get so confused between "tower one and tower two," "north tower and south tower") - I never even thought it possible that they would collapse. It never even crossed my mind. I was devastated. Unable to really think about the loss of life, all I could seem to think of was that I had loved that skyline, I had loved the sight of those two shining steel-and-glass pillars anchoring the island, and it was gone...but maybe they could at least save one of them.
And then at 10:30, as the first tower hit collapsed in slow and stately horrible elegance, I just screamed. Just sat in my living room and screamed.
I'm still not really used to the new skyline. I still feel a twinge, flying into Newark and seeing the Empire State Building and not seeing the towers, even though I know they're long since gone. I feel anger at the people who did this thing, who thought it was a just thing to do. I feel anger at the people who lead this country, who have used this thing that was done to us as an excuse for all manner of unconscionable things. I feel overwhelmingly sad at the turns the world has taken since then.
